Wednesday, November 14, 2007

NaBloPoMo in shambles

Well, it's happened. I'm out of shit to write about. I chose the wrong book off my TBR list to read this week. Inside the Third Reich, while interesting, weighs in at around 600 pages. It's engaging but slow going, if you know what I mean, and is going to take a while. All of my library books are due back, and who knows when I'll be able to go get some more.

And it forced me to face facts: my life is boring. All I ever do is work, watch TV, read books and hang out with a. my parents or b. my boyfriend. I can barely even remember the last time I got a phone call that wasn't from one of the two of them. No one even reads this blog anyway, here or at NaBloPoMo, so why am I still even writing it? It's a depressing thought. If I don't want the rest of my life to go like this, I've got to start getting out there, trying to get involved in more stuff. But work just seems to take up so much of my life, that I don't have much energy or tolerance for people I don't know at the end of the day. And I wonder where you even meet them.

The easy answer to my not having much of a life is that I've moved around too much, but I know that's not the real answer. I was in my last town for almost two years, which should've been long enough to get to know somebody. But I didn't. The few people I met there seemed to lose interest in me quickly, not that we had much in common anyway. It seems like it gets harder to make and keep friends as you get older, even cyber-friends. It's hard to make yourself make the effort, knowing the odds of it just getting slapped back at you. And it becomes a self-perpetuating cycle that way: you reach out to someone and they don't respond, so the next time someone reaches out to you, you're less likely to respond, which means that person may stop reaching out too. It seems like people in their thirties mostly hang with their families and boyfriends and that's it. I guess a lot of people make friends through work, but I only work with two other people. It's a depressing state of affairs, but I don't see it changing anytime soon.


Stella said...

I'm reading!! I added you to my Google reader a week ago. Your posts are excellent and I have gone to comment twice now, but I think your blog is munching my comments. Hopefully this one gets through.

On my blog, I recently wrote a post in reference to Yes Man by Danny Wallace. It's only a short one, so you could knock it off your TBR list in no time.

Keep up the good work!

BTW, I am commenting on here just to avoid posting over at my blog today. I've got a jolly good case of writer's block and I can't get my head unstuck.

Maricello said...

Just dropping in from NaBloPoMo land to cheer you up. I work at home, alone, and I just wrote a blog post about running out of things to say. But, the value of NaBloPoMo for me is in reading other people's blogs that you might not ordinarily come across. You might not end up making friends, but the social exchange is amusing.

Enjoy the rest of the month!